Why Heteronormativity should not be normalized


Ariana Verdin


    Over the years we have been thought to think that being heterosexual and binary was the normal way to live. To this day people still think like this and it’s absolutely not right. This mindset is in fact homophobic. You can see and hear heteronormativity on a daily basis, by the way, you, yourself, or your family members treat homosexuality. Also, how you use someone’s pronouns and how the media portrays celebrities and their relationship. As someone who is part of the LGBTQ+ community, I think it’s only fair I stand up and talk about this topic and help others denormalize this normativity. 

       I’m sure we’ve all heard at least once, “You’re not homosexual” or “It’s just a phase”, or

“Everyone is gay now it’s such a trend.” This is a sign of heteronormativity because you are invalidating someone who might have gone through hell and back to come out to you. Telling someone it is just a phase when they come out to you is so wrong and can cause trouble and bad decisions to be made. Being rejected when coming out to someone you thought you could trust can end up making you feel horrible and can put you in a bad state of mind. 

       Pronouns are something important to follow up on. Respecting pronouns is the bare minimum, disrespecting them is a sign of heteronormativity. My pronouns are She/They, meaning I identify as a girl, but I also might not identify as anything. Throughout my life, I’ve heard all types of comments made on people’s pronouns. For example, “You look like a girl so you’re a she/her.” Another one is “You look like a guy so you’re a he/him.” Once again, this is very invalidating and disrespectful. If your mindset is that everyone is either She/Her or He/Him, you are part of the reason heteronormativity is still a thing to this day. 

      Celebrities and the media take a big part in this heteronormativity. For example, Harry Styles has been portrayed as the womanizer that dates all types of female celebrities. They want to give him the norm of being a heterosexual male celebrity even though he has given out multiple signs that he in fact doesn’t just have an attraction towards women. In this  Tik Tok by creator @Matttheperson  they’re visually explaining my point. This is invalidating. You can not pressure someone to be heterosexual just to fit your heteronormativity. 

Heteronormativity needs to be denormalized and we’re the only ones capable of doing so. Keeping up with new reliable information, respecting everyone, and treating each other equally is the best way to grow out of this norm. Remember to be kind and to keep educating yourself, because you’ll be able to make this world a better place.